It's a month short of two years since I wrote on here. It's been a crazy few of years. Lots of changes with life.
My hubby started having seizures and we spent a good year and half trying to get a doctor that would help us. He is now to the point that he can function again and live a better life.
I personally have been dealing with some health issues also.
We left the church that we helped plant.
I wrote a book that is in the process of being published. I have a separate website writersa.info that is for my writing.
The original business I planned on starting didn't work out but I started selling on Poshmark making an Eccentric Hearts Closet I am selling handcrafted items along with reselling used clothing and home goods.
Twelve days ago, I lost my mom in a tragic car accident. Nine years and six days after I lost my dad in one. I am still trying to process it. I keep thinking I will hear from her still. I am constantly wanting to message her something and remember that she isn't there to get it. I am not sure where I would be right now if it wasn't for my faith and God's comfort. Each day I make the choice to do the best with what I have and live a life that I would hope my parents would be proud of.
I am updating the layout of this site and going to start updating the pages as well.
For Mother's Day this year I asked to get an elliptical/exercise bike. I did this because I want to start getting in better health so I can be a better mother, wife & friend. Being at the place I am it's hard for me to be very active with my kids and I hate it. I hate not feeling good. I am going to be blogging my progress to stay motivated and to be held accountable. I will not be going on a diet or taking any diet pills, drinks or etc. I am just going to exercise and start eating a bit healthier. No I am not going to go extreme with it. I will still have soda, junk food, etc at times. Just not as much and I am going to try to make more meals and snacks. I want to try to get to the point that I can make meals kind of from scratch. What I mean is not using preboxed foods. Every 30 days or so I will post a picture of my progress with my measurements. At first I thought yikes but then I said I am who I am I look how I look people don't like it tough, they can just go somewhere else. I only exercised for 10 minutes today for the first time but let me tell you it kicked my butt!!
Day 1 Measurements: Weight 206lbs Waist 47" Bust 54 1/2" Arms 14" Thighs 25"
Workout: Machine 10 mins Distance 1.1 miles Calories 28 Pulse at end 108
Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day. Most people find this subject as one that shouldn't be talked about but strongly disagree. Having lost an early pregnancy, then Malachi Zeke & Safira Trinity I believe that even though they had short lives they should be remember and celebrated. I love them very dearly and miss them. I know they are having an amazing time with Jesus & my daddy. I don't know why they couldn't have stayed long but I know God never left or forsake me during their loss. He comforted me and gave me the strength to endure. He blessed us with a precious little girl we got to keep and I treasure every moment with her even more cause I know how fragile life is. For everyone that has lost a little one I pray God's peace & comfort over you & rebuke any spirit that tries to take that away from you today.
Praying for the Ward family today. Losing one parent was bad enough, let alone both at the same time. It is a comfort what their pastor said though that at least they are together. I can say this even though it rough on the family that is left, Praise God they are with Him together without the pains of this world. God is the great comforter, and even though I get quite sad about my dad at times, God gets me through it and I try to focus on all the good times.
It was 1 year today that my dad was taken from us. I will never forget that day. I have the hardest time dealing with the fact that my precious Abby doesn't get to play and know her grandpa except by stories & pictures. He was so important to me.
My mom bought these paper lanterns for us to send of in tribute to him. We went behind our church and sent them off with quite a few of my church family. I thank God for putting these people in my life & for the comfort He has given me.
I love & miss you so much daddy!!
This picture of my daddy was taken our 1st Thanksgiving in the house God blessed us with, in 2010. This Thanksgiving is just not going to be the same. Please everyone remember to treasure the time you have with family and friends because tomorrow isn't promised. Some people are lucky enough to know when a loved when is dying and say their goodbyes but not everyone does. Life is to short for hatred which is why the bible says to love. God loves us in spite of us we should follow His example with others. God bless you all <3
Slide show that I made for my dad's memorial service edited with music.
I haven't wrote on here in a while. Almost a month ago my daddy was taken suddenly from me. 9 am on September 11th I got woke by a knocking on my door. It was a highway patrolman, he asked if I was Stephanie and if he could come inside to talk. He motioned me to sit down and then he sat down himself. In my mind I am hoping that it's nothing important but deep down I knew something was horribly wrong. He then asked what my relation to Thomas Anderson was and I answered daughter. What he said next took me a few minutes to process and even still today I wish wasn't true, but he told me that he was sorry to inform me that my dad was in accident and was dead. For a few minutes I sat in shock listening to this officer until I just completely broke down. I called Curtis I felt so bad cause he had the hardest time understanding me and I really think he felt helpless cause he was 6 hours away working. I texted him after the officer left asking if he could get back and he was already working on it. The officer continued to give me information and told me he had tried going to my parents house but no one answered. I knew from the vehicles he said was in the yard that my sister and mom were home, so I begged him to go tell them cause there was no way I could have drove down there.
A few minutes after the officer left I thought I calmed down enough to call my pastor cause even though I didn't want anyone there but Curtis cause I hate crying in front of others, deep down I knew I shouldn't be alone and that if I could just call him he would do something. The second I tried to talk though I broke down again and it took him a little bit to understand what I was saying. All I asked him to do was pray, which he did and it helped so much, then we hung up. A few minutes later I get a call back saying people were on the way. I don't know if they realize how much it really meant to me that they all cared so much but it meant more than words can express. I never realized how important having a good church family was until then. I mean they all gave me support and love when I had my 2 miscarriages while going there but that pain really was nothing compared to this. Someone did stay with me until Curtis finally made it home. They helped to keep me distracted so I wasn't just balling my eyes out the entire time. I told them stories about my daddy since they didn't really know him.
The next day I went to the funeral home with Curtis and Adam(my sister's boyfriend). The medial examiner in Jacksonville had to send a photo so I could identify the body cause my mom was in no condition to leave the house yet. It was one of the hardest and most horrible things for me to do but God gave me the strength.
These were the scriptures I focused on during the first week or two:
The LORD is close to the brokenhearted;
he rescues those whose spirits are crushed. (Psalm 34:18 NLT)
Weeping may last through the night,
but joy comes with the morning. (Psalm 30:5 NLT)
My health may fail, and my spirit may grow weak,
but God remains the strength of my heart;
he is mine forever. (Psalm 73:26 NLT)
God blesses those who mourn,
for they will be comforted. (Matthew 5:4 NLT)
All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort. He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us. (2 Corinthians 1:3, 4 NLT)
We had a memorial service the Sunday after it happened. There was an amazing turn out I believe it was around 70 people. It was family, friends, his coworkers from Jacksonville post office and Jupiter post office. I knew my dad was an amazing man but I didn't realize how many lives he really touched. I learned something I never knew that at his work they called him Papa. He was only 54 years old and it just shows to me that if they called him that just amazed me and really showed who he was and how much he cared for others. Bellow is what I wrote and read at my dad's service:
Tuesday was the worst day of my life. One of the most important people in my life was taken so suddenly. I know this wasn’t God’s will cause Jeremiah 29:11 says For I know the plans I have for you," says the LORD. "They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.” My anger is towards satan and him alone cause as John 10:10 says,” the thief comes only to seal & kill & destroy. I came that they may have life & have it more abundantly.” The enemy just can’t stand to see people happy. And in his last days my dad was so happy everything was going so good for him. He had just gotten his 1st brand new car, the garage he had always wanted, and he was going to be a grandpa again. That’s one of the hardest things I am dealing with is that my kids aren’t going to get to be held by or play with him. They will know of him though when they are old enough I will show them pictures and tell them stories of what an incredible man he was. That he taught their mommy how to work on cars and how he was a big teddy bear. That even though he was bigger than most and could have been a bully he chose to be a gentle loving caring man. It’s kind of cliché to say but my dad truly was the type that would give you the shirt off his back to help you. He hated getting help from others he always preferred to be the one to help others. I know I got that quality from him. If you don’t really know me or haven’t realized yet I was Daddy’s little girl & always will be.
Now it's been almost a month and the pain is still there but God helps me everyday to live on and have joy no matter what circumstances arise. I will always miss my daddy and I can't help but think of all the things I wont get to do with him anymore and all the things he loved. I live my life and will do my best to make him proud of me.
Yesterday was one month since we lost our precious little girl. It is probably why I was feeling a bit emotional. Despite that I still got 100s on my two college exams. There are times I get a little sad but God has really helped me get through everything the enemy throws at me.
In the above picture is Safira with her teddy bear that's wearing her hat on Curtis's piano where we decided to have her for now. Once we brought her home I decided that it was best to put the bear with her, because I had been having the bear with me. I guess you could say I did it for 2 reasons. One to comfort me and two to take care of it till it could go back to its owner.
I am excited to see the vision God gave me to come to past. I have no doubt it will happen. I of course want it to happen sooner than later but I trust in God's timing. Just like it says in the Word my womb is blessed and fruitful. I thank God for all He has done and plans to do in our lives. I trust what the Word says that He has plans to prosper us and not to harm us. No matter what the devil and his minions do I stand firm in the fact that Jesus has already overcome and we have the victory through Him.
The picture below is the charm bracelet our wonderful church gave me. They gave me the bracelet and the charm that says Safira Trinity. I bought the baby feet one to represent the first child we lost in September 2007, that wasn't far enough along to be able to know the gender. The other charm is for our little boy we lost August 2011.
33 years ago today was born a little boy that would grow up into an incredible man and perfect husband. I am so grateful God created Curtis and when He did he was made with me in mind. I know I am not the easiest to get along with. There are times I can't stand myself. Curtis has never given up on me and no matter what he stays by my side giving me support and strengthing my faith in God. I pray God gives us many more birthdays to celebrate together.
The first picture above was taken today after a friend that does Mary Kay gave me a mini makeover.
The second picture is the urn for our little Safira Trinity. We finally got to pick it up today. It was a little emotional but God got us through it. I think because it's so close to mothers day it's a little tough on me because I was looking forward to kind of celebrating it with a big prego belly. Plus last mothers day I found out I was prego with Malachi. But I don't have a child to get me a card or anything cause my 3 babies are all with Jesus. I stand on God's promise though that I will be celebrating mother's day with my children someday.
Welcome to my site and my life. I post updates on things I am doing or adding to my site, about what's going on in my life good or bad, & things that I believe the Holy Spirit prompts me to. I live to glorify God in all I do, to share His everlasting, unfailing love, and the nearly unbelievable good news of Jesus Christ.